Mind of a Weirdo

In the silence of the night, as my mom and dad kisses me goodnight, I fake my sleep. When I hear the sound of my door being closed, I widely open my eyes. I got out from my bed and sat down in the wooden chair near the window. I moved the curtain to the side to see the beauty of the peaceful night. As I look at the moon and those sparkling stars with a smile on my face, I remembered this particular man or maybe the memories we’ve shared. I close my eyes, and its like time traveled back from the very first day we met, from those small talks, awkward moments, happiest time we had as we exchanging laughter, until the time that I felt that he leave me hanging. By the time I open my eyes, I felt that my face being wet and my eyes continuously pouring tears yet those smile never fades. Slowly, as I compose my self to get back on track, I grin and told myself “Hey crazy little princess, you’ve done enough. Its time to get up and be happy about life!” I laug...

Sa bawat yugto ng buhay, may mga panyayari d'yan na gusto mong alalahanin at kung minsan ay talagang pinilit mong ibaon sa nakaraan. Ganyan siguro kapag natututuhan nating pakawalan ang nararapat ng bitawan. Napipili natin yung mga dapat dalin natin sa paglalakbay sa buhay at yung mga dapat ng talikuran. Kumbaga, dalin natin ang aral na nadulot pero iwanan ang mga panggulo. Sa buhay, kinakailangan mo ding madapa upang matuto kang tumayo. Kinakailangan mong umiyak upang maramdaman mo kung paano ang sumaya. Wala naman sigurong mali kung maranasan mo ang lahat ng iyan bago mo makamit yung kaligayahan mo sa buhay di ba? Ganyan din sa pagmamahal, kailangan mo din maranasan ang masaktan at mabigo upang matutuhan mo kung paano ang magmahal ng buo at tunay. Di naman siguro isang failure ang masaktan ka dahil nagmahal ka e, di lang talaga para sa iyo ang pagkakataon na iyon. Ituring nalang iyon na isang leksyon sa iyo para sa susunod na bubuksan mo ang puso mo upang papasukin ang pag-ib...

Here I am sitting at the edge of this old wooden chair. Gazing at the beauty of the moon and those bright as diamond stars.  Embracing the cold breeze of air as it blew against my face and thin body. With the melody of good music playing on my playlist, my mind start to throw thoughts. Thanks to my pen and scratch, I can filter those random thoughts as my mind start to speak. While my hand is busy catching my thoughts, I recognize myself remembering the time I enjoy your companion  - the very moment we met and consider you as one of my trusted friend. As I hold back those beautiful memories, my heart begins to cry as I bring back myself again in the reality that  we're STRANGERS with memories.

I know that there’s no such thing as PERFECT . But one thing is for sure, we can have them to be the BEST! :) How can this be possible? That’s the big question. Then, here goes my answer. 1. Have GOD in your life. -we all be nothing without Him. Whenever we feel alone and there’s no one there to be on our side, just talk to Him, believe me, it works! When we think our life is nothing, God has a way to something. :) 2. Keep the bond between your FAMILY. -there’s no perfect relationship of any kind, right? But when you have your family, and the fact that you have a strong foundation of love, trust, and friendship, it gives you a sense of belongingness in any situation. You’ll gain satisfaction and contentment in life, ‘coz you know there are people who trust and love you even in your down fall part of your life. :) 3. Having the right FRIEND. -we don’t need to have a dozen of friends, we only need this “one true friend” that no matter what happen into your life, he...

I think of you today and I guess, that is nothing new. I thought about you yesterday and the days before that too. I think of you when I'm alone on this empty room of mine. And in silence, I often imagine you. Our cute little convo's every night keep playing on my mind. But now, I only have those memories of you and these little moments spent with you. Just like in every fairy tales, it always start in "Once upon a time", but "Not a happily ever after" kind of tale.

Naranasan mo na bang gumawa ng isang desisyon na hindi magtugma ang kagustuhan ng isip at ng puso mo? Madalas, ano ba ang pinapagana mo? Isip o Puso? Ang hirap gumawa ng hakbang kung ang sarili mo ay di mo maintindihan di ba? Marahil, karamihan sa atin nakadanas na ng ganitong pangyayari. Mahirap man, nakakalito man at kung minsan nakuha man nating mainis sa sarili natin, sa huli tayo pa din ang mamimili kung ano ang dapat gawin. Ganyan kasi ang buhay, may pagkamasalimuot pero may kasiyahan ding dala. Para ka bang nasa isang Roller Coaster ride, magkahalong takot at excitement. Wag na tayong magtaka pa, dumadating talaga sa punto ng mga buhay natin na magkasalungat ang sinasabi ng utak at ng puso natin. Wais kasi masyado ang isip natin samantalang ang puso naman puro damdamin ang inuunawa. Pero kung paka-iisipin mo, Mas superior ang utak natin kesa sa puso hindi ba? At kapag brain dead ka na, wala na ding silbi pa ang puso mo. Ganun naman pala e, bakit nahihirapan tayo magdesisyon? ...

Madami ako naririnig mula sa ibang tao na ang lahat ng SOBRA masama, totoo ba? Kung pakaiisipin, may punto ang makahulugang kataga na iyon. Sa bisyo na nga lang di ba, pag sobra na, nakakasama din at may epekto na di natin nagugustuhan at napagsisisihan natin kasi inabuso natin masyado. Sa buhay din kaya natin, nakakasama pa din ba ang sobra? May pagkakataon sa buhay natin na ang sobra ay nakakagawa ng lubos na kasiyahan sa atin. Lalo na kapag ang sobrang ito ay syang iyong kagustuhan. Pero,dumarating din naman sa punto na ang sobrang kasiyahan na iyan ay syang maging dahilan ng sobrang kalungkutan. Lalo na kung ang dahilan ng kasiyahan mo ngayon ay emosyon, tao o pangyayari sa buhay mo ngayon.Tandaan! The only permanent thing in this world is CHANGE! Lahat nagbabago, ang material things nga ang bilis mawala sa uso e. Ganun din ang tao at ang emosyon, di mo kasi hawak ang tao at ang gusto nilang maramdaman. Kung masaya ka dahil sa tao at sa pinapakita nila sa iyo, i-enjoy mo ang mo...